


The Trauma

by akuma_river



Category: Harry Potter - Fandom
Genre: M/M, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-26
Updated: 2007-12-26
Packaged: 2017-11-07 03:16:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/426342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akuma_river/pseuds/akuma_river
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As the rumors and accusations of Harry being the Heir of Slytherin and a Dark Lord become more fierce the amount of pressure and isolation Harry feels mounts more and more. Luckily Harry has a friend, one who will never turn away from him, never accuse him of being dark, and whom will never betray him… Or so he thought. (This is Dark.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Trauma

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote for a challenge due for Christmas of 2007. 
> 
> This is why I have practically no squicks. Yep, this is my going to hell fic. I still want to work on the sequel. But I always have these long drawn out story-lines and so it takes me ages to work out what I want to do with it. I just can't leave well enough alone.

Fic: The Trauma (Squid/Harry, sort of Snape/Harry)  
Title: The Trauma  
Author: akuma_river  
Paring(s): Squid/Harry, Snape/Harry (sort of)  
Rating: Adult Mature (NC-17)  
Warnings: Bestiality, Uber Underage Harry (12), Rape.  
Word Count: ~4,200  
Summary: As the rumors and accusations of Harry being the Heir of Slytherin and a Dark Lord become more fierce the amount of pressure and isolation Harry feels mounts more and more. Luckily Harry has a friend, one who will never turn away from him, never accuse him of being dark, and whom will never betray him… Or so he thought. (This is Dark.)  
Prompt: #15 The Giant Squid is lonely, and takes an interest in one of the students.  
Authors Note: My life has gone to hell in the past couple of months, so I didn‘t get to do with this what I wanted. But I didn‘t want to back out. So this is my entry. I’m hoping to write a sequel to it. A tremendous thank you to LunaSphere my online male buddy who I begged to read this over for me late Christmas Day Night.

 

**Traumatic Healing**

 

Harry would toss and turn in the middle of his bed. He was always trying to find a good position to lay on, so that he could finally get some sleep. It was exhausting, night after night for weeks on end not being unable to get a goodnight’s sleep. 

The student’s whispers of him being Slytherin’s Heir and his own fears haunted him each night. No matter how often he tried, he just could not keep his eyes closed. He would hear their accusations over and over again, never letting him rest. Chasing him from any kind of peaceful sleep he tried to gain.

Like nights before this, Harry would climb out of his bed and quietly peek his head out of his curtains, surrounding his bed, and check to see if his dorm mates were still sleeping.

After sitting there still as a mouse, listening to them sleep, Harry would figure that they were all still asleep. Even Ron, who had taken to staying up late to try to catch Harry on one of his little escapades, was snoring peacefully in own bed.

Harry would quickly grab his wand from the nightstand and climbed out of his bed and made his way, ever so slowly, to his trunk at the end of his bed. Inside the trunk lay his goal, his invisibility cloak. Harry would grab it and his pair of trainers and quietly exit through the door. And every night just before he would shut the door, he would check one last time to make sure everyone was still sleeping. Once done, he would close the door as quietly as possible. 

At the top of the stairs he would finally put on his trainers and flip his cloak over his body, hiding him view and beginning his task of sneaking out of the castle.

It was in the middle of the night, dawn still several hours away and the eve of the weekend. There was a chill in the air for a cold spring night.

Harry’s goal had been the Black Lake as it had been for several weeks now. There in that place, there was no one to pester him about being Slytherin’s Heir and the new Dark Lord. No one there would trying to cheer him up. He was all by himself on the shore of the dark lake. 

For Harry, this solitude was more important than the location itself.

He just wanted to be left alone. He was always left alone back at the Dursley's. The last part of last summer was like a hellish nightmare and all this Slytherin’s Heir business was causing more nightmares to manifest.

Hogwarts was supposed to be his safe haven. Where he could go to get away from the Dursley’s. 

Ever since his induction to the Wizarding World his safe haven has also become his hostile home. It was better here than at the Dursley's, but still Harry craved something that only Privet Drive could ever give him, solitude.

He was never alone at Hogwarts, never left to be by himself, he always had people around him. The professors, the fellow students, the Gryffindors who used to be his friends, and the Slytherins who are still his foes. 

Everyone wanted a piece of the Boy-Who-Lived but Harry just wanted to be left alone. He just wanted to be Harry, and he had a feeling that as long as he was in the Wizarding World, he would never be just Harry.

That frightened him. That gave him chills in the middle of a hot humid day, the thought of being hounded down until there was nothing left of him that reminded him of Harry and that only the Boy-Who-Lived would remain.

So on the nights that these thoughts and nightmares came, he would seek out the one place he knew he could be alone. Harry would come out there and sit on the shore of the lake bundled up in his cloak and hidden from the world.

No one there but him and the Giant Squid in the lake.

Tonight though, Harry wasn’t in the mood to go to the lake. It was too cold and he thought he just needed a short walk about the castle to tire him out. It had been a long day and exhaustion was not far, he just needed an hour or so to walk about the cold, chilly castle. It should be enough to exhaust his body to point where he would just collapse once his body hit his bed once more.

All he wanted was to go back to sleep, to get these thoughts out of his head, to keep his fears away for a bit longer; but the sound of Mrs. Norris nearby caused Harry to rethink his decision to just walk around the castle for a little while.

Maybe he should make the long traverse to his secret place with his secret friend. 

So here Harry found himself walking nearly half-naked, with just his flimsy night clothes, trainers, his wand, and his cloak, across the grounds towards his special spot.

It was cold and the wild was blowing, so he cast a warming charm on himself to stave off the freezing air of the early spring morning.

Frost was still upon the green grass, though considering that it was the middle of the night with no moon shining and only being led by a Lumos spell, the ground looked like shiny crystals lit by the spell upon black grass.

An ominous feeling bit at Harry and caused the hair raise on the back of his neck, but onward he moved, determined now to reach his place and find some peace.

The wind was blowing lightly at a consistent pace and every once in a while a gust of wind would pop up and cause his cloak to flap about him.

Each time this happened, Harry would quickly look about himself to see if there was anybody around that could see him.

It being a cold and dark night, it was not shocking to see no one about, still each time it happened Harry consistently checked.

Usually the emptiness of the grounds would comfort Harry, but tonight it only seemed to cause goosebumps to go up and down his arms. Usually he would listen to this ominous feeling and go back the way he came, but not tonight. 

For some reason, Harry felt as if nothing could deter him from this. Odd, considering how against it he first was. It is almost as once he left the castle that he was being called to the Lake.

Another chill ran down his body, but on Harry walked.

Harry back on his fresh nightmares and the fears running through his body and thought that his desperate need for reassurance and solitude was what drove him on in the middle of a cold night towards the Black lake. 

Down, down, down, Harry continued his walk, towards his sanctuary from the taunts, accusations, and his own fears. Down, down, down, he continued to walk, even though every sense he had told him to turn tail and to run in the other direction towards the castle, towards safety.

The previous nights he visited his fears were staved away by the solitude of his secret spot and the friend he made.

The comfort calmed the tumultuous feelings running through him. The knowledge that there was a friend who would stay by his side, who would help him and protect him, meant more than anything to Harry.

With the thought of his friend, paving his path, on Harry walked. 

Even in the dead of night, with the cold chilly air surrounding him, and Harry able to see his breath in the air Harry continued.

On, he walked.

Eventually, Harry reaches the little grove by the Black Lake pulls off his cloak and picks up three tiny rocks and sends one flying across the lake.

He waits precisely two minutes and then tosses the rest, one after another across the dark lake. It is their secret code. Soon his friend will show up.

Harry sits down on the misty, wet grass and waits for his special friend.

It doesn’t take long until he sees the long tentacles pop up and before his eyes the Giant Squid of the Black Lake sits on top of the lake.

Usually by this time the Giant Squid would be tossing the rocks back to Harry starting their little game of fetch. Then after a while Harry would start to speak about his fears and how his day went and the Giant Squid would sit there and listen quietly as it always does. Eventually Harry would stop speaking and just there on the shore in his little spot of solitude listening to the sound of the Giant Squid flopping about in the lake.

This night though, things did not go as planned.

The hair on the back of Harry’s neck was still raised, goosebumps were still raised up down the length of his arm and the bad feeling that Harry had staved off rose higher. 

Feeling that reason for the feeling might be because he was being followed or that something was coming from the Forbidden Forrest, Harry stood up and spun around pulling out his wand and putting his back to the lake.

Harry was expecting to see something. After all, he felt like he did when he went down Fluffy’s hole, as if something was expecting or about to attack him. Instead all he saw was the empty grounds in front him.

The only thing he could hear was the sound of the Giant Squid’s tentacles in the water. Exhaling the intake of air Harry took in anticipation of a battle, Harry loosened and relaxed his position from that of a fighting stance.

Seeing that there was no threat in front him, Harry started to turn back around, when all of a sudden Harry had a feeling that the danger he felt was not in front of him, but behind him.

Seconds later, Harry was tossed up into the night air his wand, glasses, and cloak abandoned on the shore in front of the lake and one of the Squid’s tentacles were wrapped around him.

Harry screamed for the Giant Squid to put him down, thinking, hoping, that this was just another one of its games. He thought, hoped, the Giant Squid was just playing with him.

The tentacle loosened its hold from around his torso and Harry briefly felt that the danger had passed and it was all a game and he was just waiting for the Giant Squid to put him back down on the shore.

Instead another, thinner, tentacle came up to him; lightly stroking his face.

Harry by this time realized that he was in some sort of danger, but he thought, he hoped, that he could still control the situation.

Again he yelled out to the Giant Squid, demanding to be put down, that the game or joke had gone on long enough and that enough was enough.

In reply, another thin tentacle wrapped itself around him. It slipped down the back of his night shirt and looped itself around his torso.

The tentacle that was stroking his face slithered down his body as well pausing by his crotch, poking and prodding at it.

An unknown fear wrapped itself around his heart and in response Harry screamed out for help.

Another big tentacle wrapped itself around one of his legs and the one that holding him upright suddenly let go. 

Now upside down Harry felt the thinner tentacle wrapped around his torso underneath his shirt loosen it’s hold then it suddenly slithered itself down his body towards his head.

As unlikely, as it seemed, the Giant Squid was undressing him.

The unknown fear beat again at his chest, causing his heart to pound, and his breath to quicken.

The thought running throughout his mind was one filled with fear, Dear god, this can’t be happening.

Screaming once more, Harry pleaded for the Squid to stop, that this was scaring him. He pleaded with the Squid, claiming he thought of it as a friend of his, thought that it would protect him, and never betray him, and that friends don’t do this to friends. 

In response the little tentacle slithered itself back up his body towards the bottom of his outfit.

Panicking Harry started to scream his head off and in response the tentacle that had previously been prodding his crotch slithered back around and stuffed itself down Harry’s throat.

Scared to death of choking Harry in turn quick his struggles, the tentacle by his bottoms slithered in down one pant leg wrapping itself around his leg as it went towards its goal of Harry’s feet.

Another large tentacle came and wrapped itself around Harry’s torso and suddenly Harry was upright again.

The smaller tentacle then left his mouth and it too slithered down Harry’s body and down the other pant leg.

Another large tentacle came and began lightly stroking Harry’s face. 

Within moments of the smaller tentacle reaching his foot, the large tentacle that still had hold of his leg left its position and let go of him.

It too, then slithered up Harry’s body, pausing lightly to poke at Harry’s flaccid crotch, and then continued it’s short journey to the top of his bottoms and then slithered inside.

In one coordinated movement Harry was very shortly stripped of his last protection against the cold and the squids advances.

Naked as the day he was born Harry being held in the slimy tentacles of the Giant Squid and vulnerable to all.

The startling realization of what was happening and what was going to happen to him hit Harry like a trolley.

Here he was, a second year Hogwarts student, and he was about to be sexually molested by a squid, the Giant Squid, one of Hogwarts own protections, and it was about to irreparably damage him.

Harry shook and squirmed and screamed for all his might. He pinched and scratched and kicked and hit everything within reach and still he could not be released.

Harry fought and prayed and fought and tried everything in might to be released from this fate that was awaiting him.

And still it was all for naught.

The Giant Squid tired of his fighting gripped him tightly about the waist and then summarily plunged him into the ice cold waters of the lake, repeatedly, until Harry couldn’t fight anymore and he was gasping for breath and holding onto the tentacle wrapped about him for safety.

After what seemed like hours the Giant Squid stopped plunging him in and out of the freezing waters of the lake and brought him back up into the air and continued where it left off, undeterred.

More tentacles came and wrapped itself around him, they slithered up and down his body touching him everywhere. 

His head was being patted, his groin was being stroked, his entrance was being prodded and he was freezing, shaking, and scared as nothing else.

On and on the tentacles slithered up his body, teasing, poking, prodding, and stroking.

Harry could only make small gasps at the sensations as he was still stolen of breath from repeated plunging into the icy lake.

It was like his brain had gone on automated pilot, survival mode, just letting whatever was being done to his body be done.

Suddenly the prodding made a vicious turn and pain started to erupt from his rectum. The knowledge that he was about to be raped surfaced briefly in his mind, but he was too tired to do anything about it.

He couldn’t fight it anymore, so he didn’t.

As it was, when he was finally breached only a sharp, keening, cry erupted from his lips. Tears streamed down his face, but it was practically indistinguishable from the water and slime and that he was drenched in.

Soundlessly, Harry cried.

Soundlessly, Harry endured what was unendurable. 

The tentacle inside him was making thrusting motions and Harry was being thrust forwards from the motions, causing Harry to be flapped about like a puppet on strings..

His genitalia was being stroked and he had half a thought he might be erected but it, like the feeling of him being breached, was dull in his thoughts.

A particular area that the tentacle was trusting towards caused a warm sensation behind his small testes but still he was dull and numb to it all.

He barely even reacted when he finally felt the tentacle exit out of his body. 

It dully registered in his brain that it might be over that It was finally done with him. 

He wondered what would happen next, would It slowly put down him on the shore or would It suddenly let him go and let him drop into the freezing waters below him; would It expect him to swim for the shore, would It start its games again, or did It want him to drown? 

Harry dimly thought that if he was given the choice, he would want to drown. Even if he didn’t want to drown, he didn’t think that he had the strength to fight the freezing waters and make it to the shore only then to have to make the long, cold journey back to the castle.

Fear seized Harry again, swallowing his heart in its dark clenches, the Castle. Dear Merlin, people would know!

They would know he that he had been raped. He couldn’t make the long walk to the castle, he couldn’t make the long tenuous walk up those steps to the Dorms. He couldn’t hide this.

Everyone would know and the Prophet was sure to find out about it. It would be blasted across the pages of the morning post, Boy-Who-Lived Raped by Giant Squid!.

The humiliation he would have to endure would be horrible. He couldn’t live like this. He couldn’t live through this. There was no way they could just expect him to make it through this encounter and live his life like nothing happened! There was no way he could possibly live if everyone found out about this.

Harry tried to move, tried to do something, anything, but he was too exhausted from the fighting, too cold, and just too tired.

Tears again slid down his cold pasty wet cheeks and he started to wail, deep, bodily shaking, screaming and crying wails.

When Harry felt more pain come from his bottom, he knew with a deep-seated, cold, icy, heart-griping fear that this was far from over.

It seems It wasn’t happy with just the smaller, thinner, tentacles forcing itself into his body, now It was trying to force a bigger, wider tentacle into his small body.

It was at that moment that Harry wished more than anything for Voldemort to come and kill him.

Harry wanted to die, he wanted this to be over with, he didn’t want to live anymore.

He still cried, but eventually he just couldn’t cry anymore and he went silent. 

And on the rape continued, undeterred.

On and on and on.

And Harry just surrendered to the darkness in his mind. 

He was numb.

He was numb to the motions of his body being swung to and fro from the thrusting of the tentacles; he was numb to the slimy wet substance coating his body; he was numb to own blood streaming down his legs; he was numb to the feeling of a small tentacle repeatedly scooping up the flowing blood and drawing some design on the back of his left shoulder; he numb to the biting cold wind, and most of all, he was numb to the pain that was eclipsing his body.

Harry couldn’t feel any of it, not anymore.

He was somewhere locked far away in his own mind, just wishing for his death, so that this torment could finally.

Harry was so numb to everything happening he didn’t even realize that someone was trying to rescue him.

A flash of purple light, the sight of a cast spell, streaked across the night sky and slammed into one of the tentacles holding him prisoner.

Again and again spells slammed into the Giant Squid and eventually the Squid finally let go of its prey and Harry was free falling towards the freezing waters below, toward where he hoped his death lay.

Instead, a spell caught Harry and he was floated away from the dangers of the icy waters towards the shore where his wand, his glasses, his cloak, and his savior lay.

All too soon Harry lay on the ground staring almost sightlessly up at the night sky.

Harry was oblivious to everything, nothing registered to him, not the cursing words of his rescuer, the wrapping of his invisibility cloak around him, nor his glasses being put on his face and his wand being put in his rescuer’s robes.

All Harry felt was stark numbness.

At least that was what he felt until he felt his rescuer’s arms wrap themselves around his body and the felt himself being lifted and carried.. 

That briefly registered, because once he was in those arms, he wrapped his cold almost lifeless arms around his rescuers neck and let out a soft sigh.

He felt in that one moment, safety. Somehow he felt that everything would okay. It was a childish, naïve hope, but in his damaged mind it was everything.

Tired though he was, Harry didn’t fall asleep, he just listened to the racing heartbeat and quickness of his rescuer’s breath as Harry was being swiftly carried to the safety of the castle.

Throughout the trip all Harry did was breath in the dark, musty smell of the dungeons that was embedded in his rescuer’s robes and clench his arms tightly around that neck.

The knowledge that Snape rescued him dimly registered in his brain. As did the fact that Harry was seen in most vulnerable state by the person who hated him most. All that mattered was that it was now over, It was stopped. 

He was safe now. He knew that.

For some unspeakable reason Harry felt deep inside that everything was going to be okay.

As they came upon the front of the castle and Snape flew through the entrance and started to head to the Infirmary, briefly Harry woke from his numb state and grabbed Snape’s hair and said in a raspy, hardly there voice, “No, don’t take me there. I don’t want anyone to know. No one can know.”

Snape paused in his motions looking deep into Harry’s eyes, his eyes as expressionless as his face, shook his head and told Harry, “Potter you have been egregiously damaged, there is no telling what kind of internal injuries you have. I do not have the experience needed to treat you by myself. You have to have a mediwizard or witch see to your injuries or you could very well die.”

Harry his head looked deeply into Snape’s eyes took a deep breath and stated quite plainly in his raspy voice, “Everybody will know if you take me to the infirmary. No secret stays in Hogwarts. Eventually it will reach the Prophet. Everyone will know. I can’t live like that. I can’t live with everyone knowing about what happened. Everyone thinks of me now as Slytherin’s Heir, they will just think that I deserved this, that I was doing some dark ritual at the lake or something and that caused the...” 

Here Harry’s voice caught in his throat and he couldn’t finish his sentence. The fear was just too great and the damage was just too fresh to speak the words.

So he took another deep breath and said, “Professor Snape, please, I can’t live like that. I just can’t. I will kill myself if I have to endure that. I can’t handle that, I just can’t. You don’t know what it’s like. You can’t imagine all the whispers, all the threats, the dark glares, the bullying, and hearing that voice speak of killing, you can’t imagine what will happen once this gets out.”

The sound of Snape gasping at his mention of the voice completely flew past Harry’s ears. All of his focus was on persuading his Professor to not do this. “Please, please, please, don’t make me go to the infirmary. Take me anywhere…”

Harry’s voice cut off as speaking became too much for his damaged throat to take. Coughing intermittently Harry repeatedly tried again and again and again to speak, to try to plead his case. But his voice was gone not even a whisper remained. 

Eventually, Harry gave up and instead grabbed his rescuer’s robe, stared into his eyes, as tears ran down his pale, blotchy cheeks, and voicelessly spoke his words, please don’t, please sir, don’t do this, please. Please, please, please don’t make me do this.

Snape put Harry’s head on his shoulder, spoke softly into Harry‘s ear, turned around and then continued his hurried pace as if he never stopped. Now heading in a different direction, towards the dungeons, and Snape’s own personal quarters.

Harry’s tears still streaked down his cheeks soaking Snape’s shoulder. His shaking arms gripped tightly around Snape’s neck. 

The feeling that somehow everything was going to be okay, once more resumed its place inside his heart. 

Comforted by sound of Snape’s pounding feet, Harry thought back on what Snape said to him.

I will save you, Harry.

Snape never heard Harry’s wordless reply, You already have.


End file.
